Sure, we all know this, right?

You put your [right leg] in,
You put your [right leg] out;
You put your [right leg] in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the hokey pokey,
And you turn yourself around.
That’s what it’s all about!

—  Do you know, thanks to a quick Google search, that this song has a version in practically every nation and it has been in existence (researchers think) since 1826?
It’s like the Happy Birthday song.   Something everyone know, but knows so little about.

Okay, consider this.
We live la-vida Hokey Pokey.
We all stand in the circle of life shaking whatever body part a faceless voice commands with a catchy tune.

No, really!
Think of what you did today.
I’m willing to bet it’s somewhere along the lines of wake up, shower, kids (if you have any) and breakfast, and then it’s off to work.    This day is just like the last day and the day to come.

Hopefully, on the weekends, there’s some time to sleep in… yeah right.  House, cleaning, shopping, time with friends, family, obligations…  Sure, let’s attempt to pencil in some ‘me’ time during the time of 11:59 and 12:00.

Don’t agree with me?
What if we presume there are different circles?
Imagine a lot of smaller circles that orbit around the larger circle.
They could be for special options.
–  Let’s say you’re a mother.  There’s certain expectations that your children, you, and significant other expect you to meet.
–  You are a young many who just joined the Navy.  Again, the status quo must be maintained and guarded.

And, the best thing is about rotating in these circles of life and expectation, there’s an illusion of free will.  You think you wanted to be a mother and you may really had the desire, but was it you or society?  Family expectations?  The drive to prove that you could be a better parent than your parent?  Honestly, how can you really, really, really know?

Put your left foot in…

To our noble and proud young Navy recruit…  The advertisements target you.  The recruiters are unfailingly supportive and proud.  You want to make your family proud or live up to a tradition… but wouldn’t your family be proud of you anyway, whatever road you chose?  Why live in tradition?  Isn’t part of the adventure creating your own tradition?

Put your left foot out…

Me too!
I, apparently, don’t value myself.   I don’t mean in a suicidal way, but in such a way that I place others above me — even if I don’t particularly like them.  Just like the other examples, I think it’s free will.   I think I’m helping others.  I think I’m making their day a little easier.
—  It has been brought to my attention that my care for others is not free will, but rather an ingrained memory reflex from a distressing childhood.   I make myself prey for others to take advantage of.  I deny myself simple pleasures.

And you shake it all about….

To be fair, there are those among us who doesn’t follow the perceived rules.  That doesn’t mean they’re not in the hokey pokey circle.   It just means they’re in one that isn’t familiar to us.  If given enough time, their circle will bump into one of ours, no matter how briefly, to confirm that we’re all close, no matter how distant we are.

And, should one of our inner circle partners accidently shake a hip instead of a hand, the person is mortified and tries to rejoin as quickly as possible.  Sometimes, the circle is unharmed and the dance continues.   Other times, the person is so off kilter that he falters and finds himself in another circle, uncertain, distant, but will soon comply as the demands go on and the rhythm is rejoined.

We’re always in a circle.
We are always doing what is expected of us, even if we think otherwise.
We are always dancing, marionette style, to… who?   Society? Tradition?  The Greater Good?