So, I think, somewhere in the neighborhood of 36 days I will be in Florida for 60.
This will be the longest visit to Florida since my Indiana return by some two weeks and change.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit apprehensive.
Florida holds some painful and shaming memories for me.  I also feel, maybe unnecessarily, judged by some people around me.   It makes me feel uncomfortable, not sure how to act, or even how to feel sometimes.   All of that kind of blurs what I think, which could lead to some pretty stupid stuff.

On the other hand, I’m really eager to create new memories… better memories…  The past won’t go away, but I wouldn’t want it to.   They’re a gauge on how far I’ve come and what I can still do.  Or, rather, what we can still do.

To help get there, I need you to be in the moment with me.   Enjoy it.  Be adventurous.  Don’t be afraid of me.   I’m not going to crack (more).   I’m certainly not going to shatter.   We’ve been alone.  You don’t have to be that way when I’m there.   Let me help shoulder the burden.  Be honest.  Be my partner.

Also, I’m aware that you’ve grown accustomed to being alone.  You have your own space.  Your own routine.  Your own cat.   You may not be used to sharing the Kind bars and the milk.   I get that.   Before I left, I refused to take part in any of that for various reasons, but I’m ready now.

Because I am ready, you need to share the Kind bars, your thoughts, your troubles, and your joy.

I can handle it and, with the proper meds, I promise not to melt into a panic attack.

At the same time, you have to acknowledge that I have changed.  I like oatmeal, for instance.    I’m not sure how else I’ve changed, but I know I have.  I’ll leave that up to you to discover how.   Not fun, but it could be.

It’s difficult.
We’ll have our arguments and our spats, but what’s that compared to what we already survived?

Rather it’s 60 days or a thousand years, there’s only so much time we can spend together.

Let’s try to enjoy it.
We deserve it..