It’s kind of been a rough time since I last posted.

I was going to go back to Indiana last Sunday, but the plane was canceled.   They put me on an earlier flight without telling me and had to reschedule.  I’m here till Mother’s Day.

Maybe.

JetBlue announced today that they’re not going to be flying out of Tampa.   The company says there’s not enough business to bother with it.   Tampa is pretty huge, so I’m wondering if my plane won’t be delayed, but canceled until further notice.

If that happens, I have two choices.
I can stay here or can rent a car and head north.
Or, I suppose, I could go to another airport, like maybe Orlando, but I’m kind of favoring the first two options.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been on a road trip.
It’s getting hot in Florida.  A nice spring drive through the Smokey Mountains doesn’t sound half bad – even if I am going by myself.  As long as I can find hotels that have wi-fi, I can wander wherever.

Provided, I don’t know if hotels are even open but I’d imagine there’s something.
That sounds like fun, actually.  I’m an introvert.   While it might be a bit boring at times, I think I would like that.   Maybe I could stop at Chattanooga and look around.  I heard the river walk is awesome.  It would be nice if the happy and laid back of Jason could come with.   But, he’s ‘working.’   Quotation marks from his job not having anything for him to do right now.   He just sits around.   Can’t go anywhere, but doesn’t have anything to do.

Or, I could stay here and continue to feel like I’m being a financial burden, although Jason says I’m not.  We still ask each other who’s going to pay for things, so yeah…  I’m a burden.

During those years I worked and he didn’t, I came to resent him.
I hated how he wouldn’t get a job — any job — and the situation it put me in.     I don’t want him to experience the same harsh feelings that I had.   I’m pretty big on not being a burden on anyone.

Given my situation, I know I am.   But, I try to make it as little as possible.

Anyway, that’s a depressing matter.

But, the week delay through me of my game for a couple of days.

I mean, I had everything pretty much caught up.
The yard mowed.   The house somewhat straightened up.  Laundry done.
I was packed and had myself mentally prepared to go.

That’s more tricky than what you think.    It’s a delicate balance of guilt, self-care, and family.

I guess I experienced a 48-hour stun that I didn’t go.
Anyway, I got my head back in the game – a bit.

Things seem to be going… okay?
Maybe?
Sorta?