Saving throw failed.
I didn’t see Us today, but I kind of knew I wasn’t going to when I finished the blog yesterday.  But, you know, that’s okay.

I’m kind of used to getting my hopes up and then letting myself down.   It’s a tedious process but makes it sweeter when I actually do follow through with something – such as seeing Pet Sematary when it comes out.

Of course, part of the catalyst why I failed my saving throw was simply that the student loan bill came in.  I am certainly not kidding when I fully believe that not indulging in small purchases can save a lot of money.

Maybe, one day when all the bills are paid, I’ll get to do what I want.

Course, there will always be bills.  That’s how I know I’m living.  Well, it’s the grisly truth.  The living consume and there is always a price to pay somewhere.  Maybe I’m lucky it’s just money instead of a pound of flesh.

Anywhos, I’ll have to catch Jordan Peele’s movies somehow sooner rather than later.    I’m looking forward to it.

This term… this term is going okay once I stopped giving a crap about my co-instructor.  Ever since I did, everything is progressing as smoothly as it can.  Week 5 starts on Sunday.   That means I only have about 17 days left with her and the students.   Actually, some of the students seem to be fairly intelligent like KF and LW.   But, unfortunately, but as expected, a fair number are just calling it in or are exceedingly whiney.  By whiney, I mean that they want me to supply the answers and write the assignments for them.

Course, I don’t, but I’d imagine some others do.    There’s only so much nagging a person can take and these people are pros.

I think my hair has gotten longer, which pleases me to no end.  I’ve been trying to grow out my hair for years, especially after it started to fall out during my anorexic years.  My hair still isn’t fully even.  I practically had a bald spot on the right side of my scalp, especially when the House started to “adjust” my thyroid medicine.

It’s going to take a while before I can braid it again.   Hopefully, I won’t be too old to braid it by the time it gets there.

The last time I was in Florida, Jason called me his soulmate.
It wasn’t romantic or anything fluffy like that.   He said it rather matter-of-factly and it really took me by surprise.   In all of our years together, I don’t recall him ever saying such a thing.

It was just disarming and odd, but kind of in a good way.

I didn’t know how to respond.

Odd. Odd. Odd.

I guess I kind of reserve the term ‘soulmates’ for cheezy 80 rom-coms, but it is still rather charming to have someone say it.

So, I’m guessing this why I look at houses for sale in the local paper.  If things were just a little different, we could be sleeping side-by-side for more then three months out of the year, have two acres, and a house that’s under ten years old.

Maybe I could even have my own car again.

But, that type of thinking is wasteful.   It’s best left to Stein’s Gate or something.  Different timelines.  Different what-ifs.   Different realities, each as valid as the one we’re in right now.  Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.    Mulligans don’t exist.

Best foot forward and all that crap.

I am exceedingly blessed and grateful that I have a family who cares for me.  So much so, that they overrode my obnoxious stubbornness so I may live.  If left to my own devices, I would surely be dead.

But, aren’t soulmates meant to be together?
That’s part and particle of the whole thing.  Physically together. Mentally.  Spiritually.

I don’t know where I’m going with this thought.    It probably isn’t a good place.

My eyes itch and I’m getting kind of tired.  No one has really turned anything in or whined for a while.   It might be safe to leave the class alone for the three hours that are left in the day.

Been munching on Halos lately.  Not sure why.

Lalalala…
Endings suck.

Why does everything have to be so very difficult?

Difficult, I can understand.  Difficult means I don’t get bored.
Very difficult?  That’s dirty.  No fair.