Trick-or-treating started over 45 minutes ago and we still haven’t had any knocks on the door yet.

Any other year, we’d have at least a few by now. This neighborhood has several children, but this year is an exception. Not exceptional, just an exception.

I’m thinking that this is a judge of how scared people really are. Rather it be covid or politics, a brave community would come by and steal our bite-sized Snickers. A cautious one would not.

So far, no takers.

Could this forshadow what may be coming in just a few more days… the adult horror of the American election? It’s not just the election, but everything that has grown behind it ….

Okay. Several hours have passed and we only had one trick-or-treater — an unnamed three year old Batman. Guess that means more Halloween candy we won’t eat and will probably stick around until next year… providing there’s a Halloween – or any holiday at all – next year.

=– Fast forward

Happy election day – Halloween for adults.

In the past, I don’t think it tends to be. For some, but not for everyone. Not like what it is this year.

There’s a shortage of plywood as businesses are boarding up their windows.
Some people have double downed and restocked with soups and toilet paper.

Okay. Okay.
I need to get out of my head.

Just the build up of the covid, the economy, the voting, the advertised effects of the voting, plus work, the weather, and my usual psychological aches and pains have really caused a lot of anxiety.

Not depression, so much.
I did get out of bed this morning, somewhat willingly, but anxiety.

I’m starting to feel like I have to force myself to eat.
Which, in a way, I feel like I welcome. It’s a type of control and I feel that I really need to be in control of something right now.

I also want to drop some pounds and it sort of feels good to roll back into a (possible) anorexia think.

Normally, I’d work all of this out at the gym.
But, I haven’t been going to the gym. I keep making up mental excuses when I should just go. Typically, I would. But, I’m not sure why I’m so indecisive.

But, anyway, this is kind of where I am right now.

And I’m so sick of everyone bringing religion into the election.
“By the grace of God… ”
“God willing… ”
“By the power that is good… ”

God, if there is a God, has nothing to do with this.
Supposedly, we have free will. God has, in concept, a master plan.
If we vote someone in, rather valid or through deception, it’s ‘God’s plan.’
So, it’s okay.

Whatever we do will somehow be okay, even if it’s not okay in the short term.

No.
It’s a slope.
It’s hard to rise up, but really easy to slide down.

If God’s plan is for us to go through crap so we can struggle and rise up, it’s going to take generations and sacrifice thousands of lives in the mean time.

How many people died before penicillin was invented?
How many suffered so society could ‘rise up?’

But, it’s part of the master plan and we have free will, despite controlling social values, self-doubt, and group think.

If there is such a thing as free will, we severed it at birth.

“By the grace of God” is just another marketing phrase.

It’s disappointing and we continue to slide.

I really don’t know where I’m going with this. Suppose, I’m waiting for an epiphany to happen or my anxiety to just go away, but it’s not. You know, I wouldn’t want it too.

If I accept myself, which I actually do sometimes, I accept the anxiety, depression, and everything else that comes with it. It’s part of me just as much as stubbornness. Just as much as biting my nails. It’s an extension that grew, nourished, and became strong.

But, you know what, I kind of don’t want this day to be over.

In a way, tomorrow could be way worse depending on how the vote goes.
Black or white. Empire or the Rebellion. Confederation or Klingons.

No matter what happens, Trump or Biden, there’s almost guaranteed some sort of destruction and blood-letting. Between tomorrow and January, each side will have the opportunity and the ’cause’ to promote anarchy.

Personally, I don’t think it’ll affect me, personally.
My mom is well-stocked in food goods and have a lot of guns. More importantly, she has a lot of ammo.

I’m not sure about Florida. I know, on super rare occasions, there have been riots. But, the news either squished the reporting or the riots didn’t do a lot of damage. People are going to be upset, either way. Acting out is part of it.

New York. Chicago. Portland.

Might as well build walls with barbwire.
Those places are infected. Like, zombie infected.
— Course, not forgetting those who are violent to themselves or others. Suicides. Drug abuse. Animal abuse. Child neglect.

Which, I hate to think. There are good people there.
I’d like to visit, but that just might not be possible. They may not be there. They could be ravaged.

Here’s hoping that 11/4 doesn’t have the same sticky reembrace as 9/11.
We don’t need commemorative coins and porcelain plates about this.

This is messed up.
Totally messed up.