In a few precious hours, I flip from being a princess of the earth to a Queen of hell.
This Persephone is ready to flip.

My nails are done. Face is waxed. I’m all packed save for the computers.

But, for some reason, my cup doesn’t feel like it runneth over.
There’s another two months before fall starts to fade. There are just barely traces of it in the trees and I’m going to miss it – again. I understand why, but I like the fall.

My stomache has a stone rolling around in it.
I’m heavy, but that’s fairly normal for the switch.

There is, of course, a bit of dread.
I don’t want to feel trapped. I don’t want to be sick.
I certainly don’t want to be in situations that make me feel the need for emergency anti-depresseants – as happens more frequently than I like in Florida.

That doesn’t mean that I take them. It’s just that I feel like I need to take them.

I’m going to try to put up boundries.
No more crappy Christmas crappy crap events.
If I want to skip a Sunday lunch to hit the gym, I will. I shouldn’t feel obligated to do anything as I hold no obligation to these people.

I guess that’s kind of a bad attitude but I don’t want to feel like they own me or that I’m ‘one of them.’ That is something that I certainly am not. They are not one of me.