after thoughts

Don't live the American dream. Live your dream.

life

  • 7/28

    Today is kind of strange. I’ve eaten a lot. Specifically, I’ve eaten a lot of proteinGreek yogurt. An entire tub of cottage cheese. Egg white wraps. High protein Ensure. I have a grilled chicken salad and an additional chicken breast on deck for dinner in addition to a potential Fairlife should Jason want it. So,,, Read more

  • 7/27

    Here we go again. Another Sunday. Another day of just barely keeping a cap on the crazy. The crazy being the anxiety. The depression. The screaming. The wild emotions that linger just under the surface of my skin and behind my eyes. It could be worse. I could be playing the panic flute about the Read more

  • Baby Suppression

    It has occurred to be that the lower to nil birth rate is intentional. A lot of it can be traced back to the World Economic Forum and social trends. It’s intentional reproductive suppression. Just spit balling here: * Sterilization and birth defects through vaccinations. * With the rise of the gig economy, maternity leave Read more

  • 7/21

    Today… today is kind of a strange day. Typically, little sister and I would be out and about. If this was June, Jason would be here and the day would just happen. But, Jason and little sister had to work. I don’t have any appointments and had the day to myself. So, I slept in Read more

  • 7/19

    Jason is sleeping and, try as I might, I can’t stay down. When he’s at home, I try to wake at the same time he does. It’s a challenge since it’s difficult to sleep and, once my brain switches on, I begin to structure my day, what I want to do, should do, need to Read more

  • There are Four Horsemen, right? DeathConquestFamineWar. Pale HorseRed HorseBlack HorseWhite Horse These are mentioned, I think, in the Old Testament and are supposed to be indicators of the End of Times and the Second Coming. After some thought, I think I’ve identified the up-to-date version of the Four Horsemen. . big data3d printingairobotics I’m kind Read more

  • 7/4

    Okay. So, today, I’m feeling kind of lost. Jason is off of work. We don’t have a schedule. No real reason to go anywhere. It’s too hot outside to do anything substantial. No events. No appointments. Class has started but there’s nothing to grade right now. We might change the water softener filter and… ? Read more

  • 7/3

    Yesterday…. yesterday was a bit rough. I took it on myself to fight my fear and mow the yard. Yes, I know how silly that sounds… mowing the yard. But it’s more than just moving. It’s the strength to start the mower, not freaking out when it stalls, and just doing it. Just the action Read more

  • 6/30

    Today is kind of odd. No appointments other than lunch with the little sister. Spent most of the morning cleaning house. I’m between classes. The new one starts on Wednesday. I didn’t have much to do and felt the need to do some deep cleaning. When I returned from lunch, it was about three or Read more

  • 6/28

    Lately, I’ve been feeling that I need to do more with less. I’m starting to become wasteful and even wanton – although I’m not sure how that word applies. It’s like I’m fattening up and not holding myself accountable or to as strict self-regulation as I have previously. This bloated feeling affects just about everything Read more