I’m desperately trying to get out of my head today.
I had planned on dragging myself outside.

The sun. The birds. I have some Dollar Store seeds to plant.
– Don’t knock them. They tend to actually grow and are far better than the $2 plus dollars of the branded.

And I did for a little while.
I planted the Four o’clocks, some wild seed mix, and pulled up weeds.

Got rid of the trash. Came back. And I’ve entered the back of my head again. I’m trying very hard to stay out. Very very hard.

However, I can’t do anything outside right now as the neighbor is slowly mowing his yard. The dust would remove any point of cleaning the siding or wiping down the truck.

So, I’m still in my head.
It’s dark in here and I did SO well yesterday. Even if I did freeze my fingers for hours. (I reorganized the freezer – which my fingers did not appreciate.

Anyway,,, Trying to negate the dark, I want to make a list.

It’s an intellectual exercise. Right?
So, hang with me right now.

The premise is two viewpoints – men and women – and outside influences.

This is not an academic or exhaustive list. Rather, one from the top of my head.

Her:

– Debt
*** College (two to four year degrees, white collar, that are being eaten up by AI), social interactions, marketing, Klarna, etc.

– Child
(Most single parent families are female plus child. Childcare, groceries, etc.)

– “Pink tax.”
———- Look good with GLPs or be fat because of depression/addictive food. Make-up, clothes, self-care in the form of overpriced salons and hair care.

And all the typicals – rent, car payments, the ‘good’ debt.

– Women tend to consume short form content (TikTok, Instagram), be influenced to buy expensive items.

* Per the last election, they tend to be left-leaning, Democrat, and church attendance has fallen.

Community is needed and, right now, they may feel that the world is against them as it swings back from the woke/Me Too trend to conservative leanings.

AI and online platforms provide temporary companionship – which increases depression, marketing exposure, etc.

Women probably feel harassed or overwhelmed on dating apps. The lack of a safe third space, work, and children, further push them to an online platform.

Which, again, increases depression, marketing, FOMO, echo chambers, etc.

A career, if one can actually be obtained, is office and/or data entry – which means lack of physical activity. If working from home, the lack of a work community and personal interaction weighs in. There’s also the constant threat of AI. And, if an AI agent is provided to “help,” she’s actually just training the AI to take her job.

Him:

– Political
— Men, as of the last election, tend to be conservative and Republican. This places them at odds with women of the same age bracket.

– Jobs
— Their jobs are more physical in nature and, since a house isn’t built alone, tend to be communal projects.

They probably enjoy a strong work community. With a trade internship, he should also be able to roll into a job and enter the workforce earlier than a woman.

– Education
— If he’s smart, he’ll enroll in a trade school, graduate with nearly zero debt, and have an in-demand career that is (for the moment) AI proof.

– Economic
Without college debt and childcare, he could start with a more financially secure ground – providing that he doesn’t cave into the marketing hype. Given the nature of his career, funding for clothes and other areas are cheaper than a woman.

More men are attending church than women. This provides structure and community. It also reinforces conservative values.

Men tend to prefer long form social media with Rogan and Tate being examples. These provide ideas of what a ‘man’ should act like and what needs to be bought and consumed.

This may not necessarily be helpful as they can be extreme examples. If not by the men, by outsiders – like women – who already feel belittled.

Dating apps are unhelpful. Men may message women – who ghost them. Women receive a multitude of responses and are discouraged, exhausted, or harassed. Men may not receive a reply or are simply baited.

—– Outside trends:

— Debt
A woman is at a distinct disadvantage.

Women hold the most college debt:
Student Loan Debt by Gender [2025]: Men vs Women

Along with credit cards and potentially childcare, a man could become responsible for $50,000 or more should they marry.

This doesn’t count a potential house payment.

It could be difficult for a man to take on debt that could follow them for the rest of their lives. A woman may feel embarrassed by the debt. Or she may feel entitled that a man would be obligated to pay.

Also, divorce is commonplace.

This would easily add to the financial burden.

— AI
The constant threat of AI removing and restricting the woman’s job. There are a multitude graduates with white collar educations but the number of jobs are decreasing – rather they are taken by AI or simply outsourced to a cheaper alternative in another country.

_ SSRI
Both genders are being overprescribed SSRIs, especially to women. Women are more likely to seek psychological assistance and be prescribed SSRIs. They are overmedicated.

If something feels bad, it’s bad, even if it isn’t. People are encouraged to go by what “feels” instead of what actually is.

— State of the world.
Tariffs, global instability, and inflation add instability.

To pacify, men turn to websites like OnlyFans for physical fulfillment. Women turn to soft porn novels that depict interactions with mythical creatures – like minotaurs.

In each case, they are searching for the “ideal” mate and relationship – that simply doesn’t exist.

A relationship is built on shared interests, admiration, respect, and love.

With the political, financial, and ideological divide — all within one generation — there’s little wonder that the birth rate is dropping and will continue to do so.

Tradwives and the return to traditional roles isn’t a trend – it’s a trauma response – as people try to find something real in a world that is increasingly fake.